So lately, this has been a theme in my life. Truth. In more ways than one. As I expressed in my last post, my desire is to be transparant in my life. I want to be able to tell someone that they can trust me and mean it. I want the lieing to stop. A hard thing to do, but something that is necessary. Something that I beleive will be a huge step in me growing as a person. Learning to take responsibility for my actions, and no longer being afraid of people's opinion of me.
This is also a theme I want to see worked out in relationships in my life. I will take the Truth about people, about their feelings, about how we relate together, at any cost. I feel so often that since I know I can't be trusted, that I do not trust others. A small slip, can break the fragil trust i give someone in the beginning. I'm not sure if that is good or not. Maybe I trust people to easily, and trust should be gained. Maybe I don't trust people enough and trust should be given until it is lost. I don't know. But the thing is, I desire truth. I would prefer to know the worst about someone, or how they feel, then go on living a lie with them.
And yet there is so much more than that. Jesus Himself said, "I am the Way, the TRUTH, and the Life". I desire His Truth. Him. All that He is. I desire that, above all. Ahh...the words that I wish I could say honestly. The truth is, I don't desire Him above all, but another great truth, He is showing me how to do this more and more every day. Everyday I find myself desiring Him more than I had before. It is a great thing. A desire I don't think I have had in a long time. He has a long way to take me, and that is a great thing. That means the more time I get to spend with Him. The truth is, I can't survive without Him. So the more that He builds or requires this desire for Him, the better it is for me. Selfish.
In the end, may all glory go to Him